Hello, I'm Hester
Between the Dots is a journal dedicated to the quiet beauty found in ordinary moments. A space to share glimmers of light and hope, discover the world, and not shy away from tough questions. Welcome. I hope you’ll find yourself at home between these stories of things we tend to overlook.
table of contents
- ......................................... quiet beauty
- ...................................... simple recipes
- ............................................ slow travel
- ....................................... sustainability
- ................................................... health
- ............................................... Theology
- ................................ on being a woman
- ............................................... marriage
- .............................................. thoughts
One of the things that never gets easier, is the loss of a pet. And while this isn’t the first time I had to say goodbye to one of our bunnies, this one hit differently. Saar had just turned five, we were all settling into a new routine with the bunnies living indoors for a little while, spending a lot of time together under a blanket, watching tv or reading a book. And then she suddenly passed away. So I want to carve out some space in her memory.
When we first got Saar, together with her best friend Bram, they were these tiny little things that fitted in one hand. But she already had the fierce personality that made her such an adorable bunny. She quickly learned that if she made enough noise, she would get more attention – even at three in the morning. And she would growl when things wouldn’t go her way. She loved spending time with us, sitting with us for hours. That was until she discovered life in the garden, then she didn’t have time to be cuddled anymore. Her favourite time of the year was when it was -15°C and there was a mountain of snow to dig through. Luckily that’s what she got in the last month of her life.
Based on my experience with bunnies, I had expected – and hoped – Saar to live for another three to five years. Her and Bram had it so good together, that even though we had been thinking about adding more bunnies to our family, we decided against it to not risk their bond. But it didn’t turn out the way we thought.
Our bunnies are such a big part of our lives, and both throughout the pandemic and after having moved to Scotland, I spend most of my days with them. The past five years were not particularly easy, but Saar was there. But now that I’m finally out of the darkness, and I’m a bit more excited about life again, she’s not here. And it makes me wonder if our pets have a specific role to fulfil in our lives, and once they’re done with their task, they make space for the next one. And although that doesn’t make their departure any less sad, it would be quite a beautiful thing.
Both Bram and I didn’t cope so well with the silence, so we have two new girls now. For the past months, our days have been filled with cuddles, and that’s what we both needed after saying goodbye to our fierce little Saar.
Here are some of my favourite photos of her. Most taken in her favourite season.
