My attempt at living a more sustainable life started in 2017 — although I had adopted some sustainable practices long before that. Not being satisfied with the amount of waste our household produced, we set ourselves a challenge in the following year to become a minimal waste household. Over the course of six months, we made some changes that significantly reduced our waste: from 20 litres of general waste and 30 litres of plastic waste to two six-litre bins that got us through the week. We were able to keep this up until our move to Scotland.

Earlier this year, my business Quiet Mornings Photography joined the Sustainable Wedding Alliance. Given that sustainability has been a part of my personal life for so long, it only made sense to also build a sustainable business. To start the process of becoming accredited, I had a chat with the founder. During our conversation we touched on some of the sustainable practices we had to let go since moving to rural Scotland and some choices we had to make that weren’t as sustainable as we would have liked, like owning two cars instead of none, said cars not being electric, and how the amount of waste in our household has gotten a bit out of hand again (one bin for recyclables, one bin for paper, and one bin for general waste every three weeks + compost).

We talked through how some of our decisions were made — an electric car in rural Scotland is just not realistic — and why we have this amount of waste. Especially going over that last part helped me to put things in perspective. In the Netherlands, I prepared most of our meals from scratch. But with my health issues, more specifically mobility and fine motor skills, most days I’m not able to stand long enough to cook a meal or chop fruit and vegetables. So we have a lot of packaging from prepared food so I can feed myself. On top of that, in the Netherlands I ordered my groceries from a shop that used minimal packaging, whereas the supermarkets in the UK seem to be very fond of plastic. Also, living where I live now means I don’t have (easy) access to package-free, organic shops.

This is not meant as an excuse for all the things I could do better. It is meant to show you that there’s a balance to everything — even sustainability. As someone who once nearly destroyed their mental health over wanting to live as sustainably as possible, I know this. But even after years of doing my best, I still needed a reminder. And perhaps you do too.

When I first started my journey into living a more sustainable life, I lived in a big city with easy access to sustainable shops and public transport. Most of the content I consumed around sustainability came from people who also lived in big cities, so their advice easily translated to my circumstances. Living on the side of a hill with both the nearest supermarket and bus stop being a 17-minute drive away and the nearest train station 35 minutes away, some of that advice doesn’t translate. I’m sure there are more sustainable supermarkets than the ones I visit now, but does less packaging outweigh a drive that is at least twice as far? For most things I buy online, I could also plan a trip to Edinburgh or Glasgow, but does saving on shipping and packaging compensate for the six-hour round trip (either by car or car + train)? I could buy whole fruits and vegetables instead of pre-chopped, but is that worth it if that results in being unable to eat them and having them eventually rot?

What I’m trying to say is: not everything is as black and white as it’s made out to be. Even when it comes to sustainability. Maybe especially when it comes to sustainability. If we were to implement every single piece of advice thrown our way, we would grow our own vegetables, eat completely plant-based, never order anything online, produce our own energy, make our own clothes, never throw out any food, not own cars, and not produce any waste at all. Our world is simply not built that way — or at least, my world in Aberdeenshire isn’t. If you were to try to do all of this, what would that mean for your life and health? Living a sustainable life would become a full-time job, but it wouldn’t save you enough money to take time off work to accomplish everything. So you find a balance.

You make choices as to what you can do. Like finding a sustainable option when you need something new. Or growing flowers so you don’t have to buy them from the supermarket. Wearing your clothes until they fall apart and buying high-quality organic items to replace them. Combining errands, appointments and fun things so you have to drive less often. Planting fruit trees in your garden. Buying vegetables that are safe for your bunnies so they can eat the scraps. Questioning every online purchase before you place it. Going to local craft markets and shops for gifts and art. And I could go on, but I think you understand what I’m saying.

Wanting to live more sustainably shouldn’t be a source of guilt or anxiety because you can never be perfect, but rather something that guides you while making choices — because there’s a choice in everything you do. But it shouldn’t cost your health and it doesn’t have to take away the tiny pleasures you have in your life. And maybe you find that these sustainable choices even improve your overall happiness. As long as you keep in mind that it’s perfectly fine to keep a balance in what you do.